Substack (retired, see Patreon)

"As a teenager I turned, with regularity, to certain episodes of Six Feet Under whenever I needed to cry, when I could feel that damp wad of hair in my throat—a phantom form of Rapunzel Syndrome, where there's a fabled reference point beyond a surplus of hair: feelings appear locked away in a tower; I become the hero on horseback at the tower's base, calling to my own emotions to please let down their locks, thus unlocking the floodgates. But instead of calling with my voice, I call with the click of a remote. There's no remote that I can point directly at myself to unleash weeping, but if I point it at the television, the television points back at me, staring me down into submission, manipulating me into a puddle of sorrow."